Relocation Arguments

Monday, April 30
          Sonya emailed. She’s our new attorney, she says, and we should probably talk before the hearing on Thursday. {the entire family wets their pants with anxiety and confusion. New attorney? Maybe someone could have told us?}

Tuesday, May 1
          Sonya called. You have to move back, she says. You will never be granted a relocation by the court no matter how good your argument is. No matter how compliant he was when you left. You have to move back and put out the fire or you will lose custody forever. Don’t lose custody, Carrie. Focus on custody. Not on which state you live in. 

Wednesday, May 2
          Mom, me and Lucy meet in Brooklyn. I screwed up and flew us into different airports. I screwed up and got an shared Airbnb— meaning there were other people in the house and I slept in an air mattress with Lucy. No one slept. I screwed up and left my debit card at Chicago O’Hare. Entire parts of my brain have shut down and my stomach is being eaten alive by acid, like that thing from Alien. Lucy loved the park and ran for hours. She loves grandma so much. Immediate recognition and trust. 

Thursday, May 3
          Sonya called. She misunderstood her schedule and will be two hours late. Let me talk to the opposing party, she says. She gives them an offer right on the phone. My client will move back, she says. But she requires full custody and full child support. That shouldn’t be a problem, he says. We start feeling hopeful. She arrives at the courthouse after Jacob, who is also late. He looks angry and disheveled. Messy, unkempt and wild. The attorneys conference for a long time. They yell. They laugh. I’m shaking in my Danskos. Why should they get to decide what’s best for me and my small orange haired peanut? He left. He didn’t want her. 
          We sit in the foyer. The most important part of court happens in the foyer. The advocate for the child has big news. Jacob will not be granted full custody or even 50/50. But if I don’t move back, he will get custody by default. Did I hear that right? Mr Advocate,who sided  with Jacob from the beginning, who never wanted to hear my story and questioned everything I did? I still don’t know if I heard that right. 
          The court referee comes out. It’s lunchtime, she says. Make a schedule of when Jacob will have Lucy and get back to us. It’s not that hard. Just get together and make a schedule. Jacob’s attorney digs his heels and starts arguing for custody again. Mr. Advocacy wants to to video conference. We agree to meet via computer to discuss scheduling. Be back June 7 with your schedule and agreement, she says. 
        Everyone leaves. Jacob stomps and whines about the visitation schedule. It’s not enough time. I should get her on her birthday. You already got Easter. You were supposed to be here last week. It’s not fair. 
          Nothing’s fair. Everything’s my fault. Didn’t you know that?

A very warm, ugly cry hug to my mom, sister and Laurel for pulling me through this week in very incredible ways. 

Comments

Megan said…
Oh, Carrie! My heart is aching for you. Love and prayers to you, my friend.
May 5, 2018 at 11:06 AM
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