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Hash tagging is one of those things that I refuse to do but love reading other people's. Not sure why, maybe I'm staging my own one-person rebellion against pop culture or maybe it just seems like a lot of work to write all those scrunched up words. But honestly, some of them are really funny. And I've noticed that since moving here, my mind has started thinking in the form of hashtags. I know you do this, too--you write status updates or haiku or short poems in your head all day long and they never get on paper or any kind of social media. Everyone does that, right? RIGHT?!?!?!

So the past few weeks I've been hash tagging this one in my head : #miamiproblems. I even went on Twitter and discovered that my idea isn't that original, many people are posting Miami problems of some sort. Usually in the form of drinking or plastic surgery. Here are some of mine, straight from my head to this piece of paper:

Take a wrong exit, lose 45 minutes of your life. #miamiproblems

No one told me South Beach was a topless beach. I had to find out the hard way when I took the girls. #miamiproblems

And then we got evacuated when a thunderstorm came. #miamiproblems



People doing a mass exodus out of the water. For as much as I hated Miami/South Beach, you gotta admit that the color of water plus color of sky is very beautiful:


When you go to a restaurant and the only thing that looks good on the menu is fish tacos. #miamiproblems

Leave a scrap of lettuce on the counter, two minutes later it's an anthill. #miamiproblems

I asked someone today where people go on vacation. I mean, if you live in the vacation spot, where do you escape to? She said, "The mountains. Or Las Vegas."  And then I looked in a magazine a few hours later, and it was a whole article about a family from North Carolina who visited southern Utah's parks. I thought, I guess in some way I used to live in the vacation spot, too. Followed by the thought, There is no hiking here. #miamiproblems

The thermostat is permanently on 76 degrees. One degree less, it's freezing. One degree higher, it's boiling. #miamiproblems

When people refer to the winter or other seasons, they use air quotes and knowingly smirk. Because really all there is is rainy season and not rainy season. #miamiproblems   (As a side note, real hard core locals will ask, "When is Utah's rainy season? When is Washington's rainy season?" Me: "Ummm...*cough*". )

According to these said locals, hurricanes are better than earthquakes because, and this is a direct quote, "At least you know they are coming and you can prepare!" People.....I'll take my earthquakes. #miamiproblems

I will update next time on my job progress and other fascinating topics. I will also refrain from gushing over my husband and how happy we are. You're welcome. 





Comments

Jennifer Walker said…
I happen to think in hashtags, spoonerisms and poems ALL day long! In fact, Rachel came into my office right now doing something funny with her lips and instead of saying, "Nice fish lips" I said, "hashtag fish lips". What's happening to us? LOVE hearing about your Miami adventure. Seriously!
August 10, 2014 at 5:58 PM
Unknown said…
#fishlips

So funny!!

#missyou
August 11, 2014 at 5:21 AM
Mari said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
August 13, 2014 at 6:41 PM
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